Grady's Birth Story - Part 2

So, like I said, I had a beautiful baby boy. But, I also had a pretty bad 3rd degree tear/cut...and it was pretty zig-zaggedy. Not fun.

After he was born they put him immediately on my chest. I would've immediately nursed him (he was trying to find it), but I was lying flat on my back being stitched up...not a good nursing position esp. when you've never done it before. (picture: the first time I held him...my first picture with Grady)

One of the things that I REGRET SO MUCH is that I had had fever right before Grady was born. Well, of course I did. The room was super warm (while we were sleeping), I was completely immobile and under some really heavy heated blankets. It felt really nice, but I'm sure the immobility coupled with the heat was just enough to get me a little warmed up. (picture: during his first day...this is probably what he looked like when he came out, with that fist right on his forehead) By the time the labor was over I had no fever anymore, but Grady had a touch I believe...soon he was fever-free too. But, because of the previous fever, they wanted to get blood and run some tests. I should've just told them no. But, I complied. They took him to the nursery to get the blood and after a while a nurse came and told us that they had gotten some blood after a few pokes, but it wasn't sufficient for the lab. She asked if we still wanted to consent to them getting more blood. I must have been completely not thinking for a few hours after the birth...I didn't even think about it...I said yes, that we needed to go ahead and get it. What was I thinking?!?!? They had to poke him even more...several more times. Pretty horrible start at this life, esp. when it was completely unnecessary. Anyway, I've thought often about that and how I totally didn't protect my little baby boy then. I hate to even think about it. I've even explained that all to him before, asking his forgiveness. :-) I'm quite sure that he doesn't remember, but still...asking your child's forgiveness is a huge thing anyway and for him to know that we make mistakes (and did right from the start)...well, I think it just adds to our relationship. Anyway, that is a major regret for me. I don't harbor unforgiveness towards myself, but still...not my best moment as a mother...but, moving on.

He was born on a Sat. morning and at some point in the middle of the night Sat. night, we noticed that it just seemed like he was SO hungry and not getting anything. Of course my milk hadn't come in yet and he was a big boy with big needs I guess. But, still...the colostrum was supposed to be enough...and he was supposed to be sleeping, not awake all the time wanting food (I've read stories of babies who were just fine without really getting anything to eat for a couple of days until the mom's milk came in...then about that time is when they started to really wake up). Anyway, inexperienced us decided to just supplement...just until my milk came in. Really though...we didn't know what else to do (now we know better...you'll read about it in Eissa's story...took us that long to be told exactly what to do). He seriously stayed latched on to me at one point for one hour on each side (that's 2 hours total) and was still screaming hungrily. (picture: our kids have all come out smiling...and no, it's not because of gas)

We stayed in the hospital until Monday morning and then headed home. Monday night my milk came in. It was still no good though...I just didn't make enough, period. I took every herbal medicine known to man (that was supposed to stimulate lactation), drank every herbal tea, was practically waterlogged all the time from drinking so much water, pumped alot...all in hopes of making enough milk. I finally went to see a lactation consultant after about 6 weeks. There I got more herbs and also rented a hospital-grade pump. The routine went like this...I would nurse Grady, supplement him with formula, then pump on each side for 15 minutes. Basically by the time I had gone through this whole routine, it was time to nurse Grady again. It was super draining and tiring and disappointing. I did this for about 6 weeks or so (therefore Grady was 12 weeks...can you tell I wasn't giving up easy? :-) ). Then, I had a trip coming up. Me and Grady went to Saline for Easter (Joel flew himself and met us there) and I decided that if it hadn't happened before we left, I was not about to rent a hospital-grade pump for Saline and keep up that routine. It unfortunately didn't happen before then, so I continued to nurse him after that point when I felt full, but after I stopped pumping, basically my milk just gradually decreased until I never felt full and was exclusively bottle/formula-feeding Grady...that was around April I guess. That was a disappointment. I was never into it because of the "bonding" factor...I feel like you can bond just fine without having a baby latched on. But, it's just so convenient and natural. That's what God meant...what He designed our bodies to do. Why wasn't it working? But, like I said, I learned more later...and for this time, I just got over it. (pictures: first family pic. and all bundled up, about to leave the hospital)

Ahh, Grady...my non-sleeping baby. This was another thing that was different than what we expected. I had no idea what those people were talking about when they said they had to wake their baby up to nurse. Our baby was always awake. Was it because we were inexperienced and were constantly overstimulating him? Was it effects of the drugs he had gotten at the hospital (through my epidural and other drugs)? Was it a lack of a proper routine, even though we were trying to get him on a routine (the Babywise thing)? All of these things are technically a possibility. Who knows. We'll probably never know, but to say that we learned alot is an understatement. We managed though.

He was pretty fussy for a while. Some would've called it colic. In fact, when Joel's mom came to visit when Grady was about 6 weeks old, we were at the airport waiting for her flight home when she said that she'd be praying that Grady wouldn't be so colicky.

The good thing is that around May (4 months), he started sleeping through the night. The bad thing is that he didn't nap during the day really...he would sleep around 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the afternoon...not good naps by baby standards (he did this until right after his first birthday, then miraculously started sleeping about an hour and a half each time and we never had sleep issues with him again; I think God was just giving us a break before the little sister came along). But, he ceased that fussiness and was a good baby...just wasn't into sleeping much (during the day). He would go down sometimes around 5:30 or 6pm though and sleep until 6 or 7am the next morning. Usually he got up around 6. So, even though the naps during the day weren't good, he thankfully was an excellent sleeper at night. That was great.

And how can you beat those dimples? :-)