The Joel and Michawn Story - Part 12

I went to the Ladies' Retreat with our church that weekend. After we got home on Saturday afternoon, I met up with Danny for wakeboarding. Joel and another guy named Joel went too. Danny and Joel stayed after we were done...slept on the boat that night.

I had given John the letter I had written Joel that Thursday. On Sunday morning I asked him about it. He said, "Just hold." Wow...another test. Nicole was standing there and said, "Can you at least give her an explanation why?" (Wives SO soften things sometimes, don't they?) John said, "Just hold." I asked him if he had read the letter. He said he hadn't. I asked him if he would just read it, that I wouldn't give it to Joel, I just wanted to know what he thought about the letter and what it said (man, I had come a long way in my submission...if you only knew...but, that's for another blog at another time). He sat down and read it. He said, "It's good. Talk to Dave about it." :) What a series of hoops to jump through...Joel would say that he jumped through way more than me though...and he did.

I gave Dave and Tammy the letter before church. They invited me to lunch to discuss it. Dave compared mine and Joel's situation to Jim and Elisabeth Elliot. HELLO! Her books and just their relationship had come alive to me over that summer. I had had those books forever, but had always shied away from them. I just didn't want to even think about relationships and get stirred up and all and such before the proper time (I had even stopped watching romantic comedies and all). But, that summer I was "in it" (the proper time had arrived), so I pulled them out...specifically the book "Passion and Purity." I think it was truly God for Dave to use them (the Elliot's) as our comparison. Dave went on to explain that nothing had swayed them from God's purpose for their lives, from what God wanted, even though they had all of these passionate feelings for each other. He said that he's sure that Elisabeth got frustrated at times (they waited for 5 years for God to give the go-ahead for marriage), but she submitted and trusted God. Dave went on to say that as a result she was totally honored and rewarded by God...she was able to ultimately fulfill Jim's dream of reaching the Auca Indians, and she deserved it. Dave talked about how I handled things then, my submission, was directly related to how I would handle things and respond to things in my marriage. He said that he didn't think it was a "no," but it was just a matter of God's perfect timing. That part floored me...freaked me out a bit, but excited me at the same time. He said that it was a season of testing for me. He said that me and Joel had all these feelings that were natural, it was O.K. He said to keep open communication, don't cut it off. That was huge to me...I was even comtemplating not talking to him as much...limiting our communication. Even though it had never been weird and even though I was guarded, I just thought it might be a good idea to just kind of step away from even close friendship for a while. The conversation with Dave was awesome to say the least.

I left their house and went to Joel's house (he was living with our friend Justin by that point). They were having a get-together that afternoon, so it was lots of fun just hanging out with everybody. At one point everyone went in the house. Joel and I stayed out on the deck to kind of talk and catch up a bit.

At first Joel indicated to me that there were things he wanted to tell me, but then he said, "Give me a week. I learned my lesson last time about opening my mouth too soon. Give me a week. Can you do that? Can you just trust me on this one?" I told him, "I've trusted you for a long time now, Joel. What's another week?" :)

More on this conversation in Part 13 (I can't believe I'm still not done). :)

Again, no pictures...they start up again soon. But, in lieu of pictures today, go here for your early Christmas greeting. Apparently we have too many kiddos, so Mama opted out. :)