Eissa's Birth Story - Part 2

I had been losing more of my mucus plug over the weekend before Oct. 10th (2006). On Tuesday at 2:15 AM I woke up and went to the bathroom. I had lots of bloody show. I went back to bed about 2:30 AM and contractions had started. They were about 3 minutes apart and I knew that this was it. I told Joel and he got up and got everything ready...finished filling the birth pool (we had bought a Spa-N-A-Box...completely heavenly), etc. I was walking around through the house...during a contraction I would have to stop and lean against the wall and breathe through them. Around 3:30 we decided to go ahead and call the midwife to let her know what was happening. Around 4:15 the contractions got to the point of the need to moan through them (I found out with Hadley's labor that I'm a moaner...it really helps me to moan in a low voice through the hard contractions; never thought I'd be a moaner, but here I am...a moaner). Sylyna (my midwife) got to our house around 5 or so. Around 5:35 she checked me and I was 3 cm and 90% effaced...at a -1 station. She checked me again at 7:20 and I was 4-5 cm. At 8:00 the kids woke up and left with a friend. (picture: in the sitting position)


The whole time I was in labor I was sipping water and going to the bathroom probably about every 30 minutes or so. Other than that, I was in the side-lying position on my bed mostly...a little while I was in the sitting/reclining position (all Bradley stuff). At 8:50 I was checked again and was 6 cm, 100% effaced, and at a 0 station. At this point Sylyna told me that I could get into the birth pool (before this I had been relaxing, per the Bradley method, on the bed as I said). We wanted to wait until just the right time to get in the pool...didn't want to do it too early as that will slow down labor instead of helping things sometimes. So, after I was checked at 8:50 I went to the bathroom and then got in the pool...probably about 9 AM. I probably had 1 or 2 contractions and then I started throwing up. With every heave I realized that amniotic fluid was shooting out of me. So, my water broke (although, I had been leaking since I started labor at 2:30). With the next contraction I felt the baby move completely down (it was a weird feeling) and I felt a huge urge to push. It was strange because with my other labors I had never actually felt that strong urge before. Really, I had probably just been impatient and not waited on that urge that is supposed to come. But, this was undeniable and I knew that I had that urge that everyone talked about. With this labor, I had determined that I wasn't going to push at all until I felt that. I think that with my other 2 labors I knew it was time (I was 10 cm) and I was hurting and so tired and just wanted it to be done. So, I would push, even without the urge. I had also purposed with this one that when it was time to push and after I had the urge, I was not going to rush it. I was going to let this baby be born "hair by hair." (pictures: 1) side-lying position; 2) in the spa...I was already pushing at this point)

Well, so even though I was having this incredible urge to push, I seriously doubted it was time because I had just been checked and was only 6 cm. I told my midwife that I had to push. She said just to listen to my body. It was 9:20 (I had been 6 cm at 8:50). I asked her, "So, my cervix is out of the way?" She checked and said yes...that the head was just right there and I was complete. So, I started pushing then (because I had to...again, at 9:20). At 9:28 the head was born and at 9:29 Eissa was completely out and in my arms...all 9 lbs. 14 oz. and 22 1/2 inches of her. I went from 6-10 cm in 30 minutes and pushed for only 9 minutes. I was so happy...and shocked! We had thought I probably had at least 2-3 hours longer when I was only 6 cm at 8:50...it was a great blessing to be done already. (picture: Eissa's first picture)

Another great blessing was that I hardly tore at all, esp. a blessing after my history of the other 2 births. I did tear, but not along my old episiotomy site, and I only tore after the head was already out. Her little shoulders got stuck a little bit and when they were coming out I tore a bit on the side...but, only requiring 3 stitches. Amazing though...she's been my biggest baby by far (Grady was 9 lbs. 2 oz., Hadley was 8 lbs. 4 oz.)...and I don't think I would've torn at all if her shoulders wouldn't have gotten stuck. What a blessing, esp. like I said, compared to my history in that. So, it was just a great birth all the way around and we are so happy about that. (pictures: this one and the one below...just a few hours old, hanging out with the parents)

Recovery time was completely normal this time. I healed up quite nicely and quickly. And breastfeeding with Eissa...had enough milk AND didn't have to ever pump or take medicine. Let me tell you what I am thinking may have been a factor in that...

As I said, with the other 2 I supplemented when it seemed like the baby was just ravenous and screaming for food...both time within 24 hours of birth. The same thing happened this time. It was actually during that first night...she was not getting satisfied on just the colostrum (if she was getting that). I was about to give in to her screams and cries and send Joel to go get some formula. But, my midwife had made me promise that I would not supplement for at least the first 48 hours...and if I was tempted to, to call her. So, we did. I was so frustrated, thinking she just didn't understand...I just didn't make enough milk. Well, in the end we didn't supplement...and Eissa did go to sleep. (picture: an Eissa smile...a couple of days old)

I had her on a Tuesday morning and my milk came in on Wednesday night. I had plenty and Eissa did fine with just my milk (no supplements of any kind). I never took any Fenugreek or any of those other humpteen jillion herbs I'd taken before...I didn't pump, I didn't waterlog myself drinking ridiculous amounts of water. It was just amazing. Was it because I hadn't given in and supplemented like I had with the other 2? I'll never really know, but I know that I will stick to the same game plan this time...I won't be supplementing right away even if the baby seems like he/she is starving. Maybe that extra sucking when she was completely ravenous (but not getting formula) did it...the whole supply/demand thing. (picture: first family pic)

Anyway, it was the best birth so far. And of course, Eissa is such fun. Hopefully we will continue on that upward trend and this birth coming up will be even better than the last...although I almost don't know how (maybe no tearing at all...that would be nice). Anyway, we are looking forward to seeing how it turns out. And so thankful for this great little Eissa we have. (picture: Eissa now...15 months old)

Just one more post concerning birth tomorrow.


Now, just a few more extra pictures...

A few fun "before" shots that I forgot to post yesterday. These were all taken while we were visiting in Boston.


If you know Eissa, you know that this is one of her signature expressions. If you even whisper the word 'no' to her, she does 'the lip.' Funny to see that she was doing it already when she was just minutes old. Apparently she didn't appreciate the suctioning.
A few hours old.
The kids' first peek at Eissa.

The happy kick.

Eissa's Birth Story - Part 1

(Note: I am posting twice today...scroll down for the other post)

I found out I was pregnant with Eissa Jan. 31, 2006. Hadley was 11 months old at that time (Grady had just turned 2). There was a LOT of transition going on during my pregnancy with Eissa.

We had moved from Phoenix, AZ (where Grady and Hadley were both born) back to Longview, TX when Hadley was 4 months old. We set up house in Longview (did some traveling during the summer to see Joel's family) and got re-established in the Longview community (traveling was over and we moved into our house in Longview in August '05). Then, in November is when we started seeing the doors opening up to move on to the mission field with MAF (Mission Aviation Fellowship). We of course did the whole holidays with family (in Louisiana). Like I said, found out about Eissa's pregnancy in January. Put our house up for sell in February. Joel no longer had a job after the first part of February. We spent the month of March in a hotel in the Dallas area (Joel was getting his private pilot's license)...had had a huge garage sale to sell most of our stuff the weekend before we left to go to Dallas. It was in April that we found out about Asas de Socorro and started the process of going with them instead of MAF. In May, June, and July we spent a good bit of time visiting family and friends in Louisiana...we lived in Longview still, but spent alot of time in Saline. Joel also worked some as a flight instructor at a nearby (near to Longview) airport. By the end of July we had sold and closed on our house. At that point we didn't even know where we were going to go after that, where we were going to have the baby, who was going to deliver, etc. (I was due Oct. 6th). I had been seeing an amazing midwife there in East Texas and I SO wanted to have her deliver Eissa. Right at the last minute in July, a couple from our church offered their guest house to us to live in and have Eissa in. When we moved out of our house, we were able to take some of the stuff directly to their guest house for when we moved in there. We weren't moving in just yet. No, we still had to travel to Louisiana, to Boston and then to Brazil (yes, flying internationally at 34 weeks pregnant)...then back to Boston, to Louisiana, and then, finally, to our little guest house in Kilgore, TX, where Eissa was born. We arrived at the guest house Sept. 10th. It was good to finally be where we were going to stay until I birthed this baby (I was 36 1/2 weeks pregnant). :-) (pictures: on a walk in Boston; on a plane on the way to Brazil)

That week we got to work getting everything ready for when the baby came...we just knew that it was going to come any day (esp. me...why I ask myself now, but whatever). :-) Joel took care of the kids mostly (a big job) while I set up house, made meals to freeze, bought everything needed for the home birth, etc. We were busy, hurrying to get everything done before the baby came. (picture: Hadley had to have a picture on her stool too)

Around Sept. 15th I started losing some of my mucus plug (maybe this was part of the huge motivation and push to get everything done quickly). Even though I knew that that didn't really mean anything (I knew that some people start doing this weeks before their baby is born sometimes), last time, with Hadley, when this started happening, I was in labor with her within 24 hours. So, I felt sure that it would probably be soon. (picture: we did LOTS of walking while we waited there at our cute little guest house in Kilgore)

Nothing happened and the next weekend I experienced the most horrendous headache of my life (what I would definitely classify as a migraine) that seriously put me out from Sept. 22nd - 27th. But, nothing really happened after that...no more mucus plug, no contractions resembling labor, etc. So, we just waited...waited and walked and I was also using some herbs off and on for the 3 weeks or so before labor (for instance, using Evening Primrose Oil as a vag. supp.). At my 36 week appt. (on the 11th of Sept.) I didn't have any dilation or anything. At my 37 week appt. I was 60% effaced, but still no dilation. I wasn't checked at my 38 week appt. because I had that horrible headache and such. I skipped my 39 week appt...I was fine and was just so ready to have a baby...I was 4 days away from my due date and just felt sure that I didn't need to go. :) I was supposed to go see my midwife again on Thursday, the 12th...6 days after my due date. But, fortunately, it happened on the morning of the 10th...I went into labor. (picture: early stages of labor...still walking around)

And all about that...tomorrow.

31st

The most wonderful man on the planet turns 31 today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEL!!

We love you, love you, love you!




Now, some pictures of this birthday morning.

Making the cards.


Excitedly showing Daddy what they put together for his breakfast in bed. Grady went outside and picked a flower to put on Joel's plate.

Hadley's Birth Story - Part 3

First of all, Hadley was a little jaundiced. We would just put her in the window and let her sunbathe. She was all fine in a few short days. She was also that super sleepy baby that we'd always heard about...just slept and slept. That is a side effect of jaundiced babies, but she continued this pattern even after she was all better (still loves to sleep). Yes, we'd have to wake her up to nurse. It was great. (picture: all the pictures throughout are just of Hadley and Grady, age 13 months at the time, and our family in the days following Hadley's arrival)

Recovery after Hadley's birth was much better. I did tear during Hadley's birth, but nothing super major (nothing comparable to before, that's for sure)...it was a good thing, to be able to "start over" with great stitching up. Funny thing...I never had pain medication at all with Hadley's birth...or recovery. When the midwife stitched me up, she didn't use injectable local anesthetic...just a spray-on anesthetic. That doesn't do much, my friends. It hurt. And I healed just fine...fairly slowly actually...but completely and normally. But, I never even took one Ibuprofen. Seriously, and you may think I am totally whacked out, but it just never crossed my mind. I guess I had gotten through labor and delivery without it...never thought about taking it after that. Whatever. Funny to think about now. I probably would've had a much more comfortable recovery if I had taken something, but whatever...it was fine. I recovered. And, I know that if I'm stranded somewhere without meds. and give birth again, I'll be able to do it and recover just fine without it. ;-) You always have to look for the things learned in every crazy situation, right?

As far as the breastfeeding with Hadley, I had her early on a Sunday morning and Monday night by milk came in. I had supplemented a little before my milk came in (I now wouldn't do that...more on that later though). But, I still didn't seem to have enough for Hadley, even after the milk came in. So, I went ahead and went to the lactation consultant (the same one I'd started seeing when Grady was 6 weeks old). It was the same old deal...nurse, supplement, pump.

After that was producing about the same results as it did with Grady, Lori (the lactation consultant) actually suggested something else...medication. I started taking a drug called Domperidone (Motilium). It is an intestinal/digestion medication that has a side effect of increased milk supply. Weird...but it worked. And I was so very thankful. It was a bit hard to get...it's not approved in the U.S. for that purpose, so really it's not supposed to be readily available for that purpose. There was one midwife that was willing to prescribe it for a limited amount of time. Sometimes you can take it for a while, have it boost your supply, and then wean off of it. I was never able to wean off.

So, basically I had to buy it black market. :-) I bought it off the internet from some company in Europe. But, I had taken it before and knew that I had no ill effects from it, so I was fine with that...and just happy to have something that allowed me to nurse my baby.

With the medicine I was able to nurse exclusively (no formula). When Hadley was about 6 months old, we started offering her a bottle (formula) when she went down for the night, but most the time she didn't want it. So, we were thrilled to be able to do without formula and bottles with baby #2. Such an answered prayer, even if it was in the form of a medication. And, when she was about 8 months old (and still not eating solids...this kid was not interested in real food until she was about 8 1/2, almost 9 months old), I actually was able to wean off the medication and stop taking it altogether.

So, yes...recovery a MUCH better process with Hadley. And, what a fun little girl we have! Yay, God!!

Hadley's Birth Story - Part 2

Saturday, February 19th, at about 4am I was dreaming about being taken captive and taken to Africa (along with Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston...still married at the time) when I was in that semi-sleep state. I kept thinking “I’m leaking. I need to go to the bathroom.” I finally woke up and went and had a little gush when I sat down on the toilet. When I went back to bed I told Joel what had happened...that my water had broken. He went ahead and got up and started setting up the birthing tub (we had rented one from Carol, the midwife). Around 6am I still wasn’t having any contractions and we decided to go back to sleep and get as much rest as possible. I dozed a little, but not much. My mind was racing...I was too excited. Grady got up around 7:30 and Joel got up with him. When the phone rang around 8 or so, I just went ahead and got up.

We finally talked to Carol around 10:45 and she told me to do more of my favorite...yes, nipple stimulation. :-) I was to do that for an hour and then call her. I did that and nothing changed...still no contractions to speak of. She told me to take 3oz. of castor oil with ¾ cup orange juice and ¼ teaspoon of baking soda. I ended up taking that around 1:20pm (we had to go get some), then doing nipple stim. and walking back and forth through the kitchen and living room from 1:30-2:30, squatting through any contractions I had. I wasn’t haven’t many contractions though...they were very random. The ones I did have were pretty strong and lasted a long time.

I waited to take any more of the meds. until after the castor oil kicked in...that happened about 3:20. About 4pm I took more tea and 5W and I actually started having some contractions, coming every 3-4 minutes and lasting about 1 ½ minutes...they were pretty strong, but still not really hurting that bad. Around 4:30 or 4:40 I had a big gush (I had been having little gushes and trickles all day long...my water didn’t all come out at once). It was everywhere so I headed to the shower. After the shower our friends were there to take Grady and babysit him for us, so basically with all that, my contractions had stopped unfortunately.

About 6pm I got back to bed. I was hoping the contractions would start back up if I was relaxing on the bed. They did...they started right back up again. They were 3-4 minutes apart again, but not as strong as earlier and only lasting 30 seconds – 1 minute.

At 7:40 I talked to my midwife again and to try to make my contractions stronger she wanted me to walk and do nipple stimulation for another 30 minutes. I walked from 7:40-8:10 and had several really strong contractions during that time, but the walking just made me really uncomfortable and I think it wasn’t necessarily because of the stronger contractions but because I had intestinal cramps and such...residual effects of the castor oil probably. When I went to the bathroom my contractions stopped again. What I was doing obviously wasn't working since I'd been doing it for hours on end. I called Carol about 8:45 and she said she had no idea what my body was doing...that she was coming over.

Carol got to the house at about 9:30. She checked me immediately and said that my cervix was “extremely posterior”...hence the irregular contractions. Oh good...an answer to why this was happening. I was already 3cm dilated though, even though I had had such irregular contractions...and 80% effaced. I was thrilled at the dilation. Carol held my cervix forward for about 5 contractions (about 30 minutes) while stimulating contractions (she would rub my cervix and also there are certain pressure points on your body). After that I was up to 5cm dilated (almost 6 Carol said) and my contractions were feeling stronger, like they were starting to do something. I was like, "can you just keep your hand in there?" :-) That was some great dilation in just 30 minutes. She opted not to though. :-) Ha ha. (picture: so happy to be at 5 cm...and finally having regular contractions; obviously this was taken in between contractions; contractions were coming every 3 minutes after Carol got done with her tricks and labor was on)

At 10:40 I got in the birth tub. At 11:10 I went to the bathroom and then got in the bed in the side-lying relaxation position (left side). That actually kind of slowed my contractions down a little, but I was able to doze off a little in between them...had basically been up since 4am working really hard to get contractions going. Unfortunately, I was already completely exhausted at this point. (picture: laboring in the birth pool)

At around midnight I sat up and had a large gush of water. At 12:30am Carol checked me again and I was 7+cm dilated. At 12:40 I went to the bathroom and then got in the tub. I remember I was just so out of it...probably because of just shear exhaustion...I wanted to go to sleep so bad, but it just obviously wasn't an opportune time for that. :-) At 1:30 I went to the bathroom again and back to bed. This whole time my contractions were consistently about 3 minutes apart and getting stronger and stronger. At 1:50 I was 8cm and I also vomited...did that with Grady too (if you'll remember I vomited when still only 2cm...but, I also vomited at transition/almost pushing time). At 1:55 I started squatting (on the floor at the side of the bed) through the contractions to try to help me open up and bring the baby down more. At 2:30 I was back in bed and only the rim of my cervix was left so Carol let me push with each contraction while she held the rim open. By 2:40 I was completely dilated and baby was at +1 station, at 2:50 baby was at +2, and at 2:55 baby was at +3. At 2:58am (by our clock; Carol said that the correct time was 2:53...our clocks were fast), Hadley Cloteal Ebersole was born. Joel told me “It’s a girl” and then he cut the cord (my placenta came out right after the baby). She was beautiful. She weighed 8 lbs. 4 oz. and was 19 ¾ in. long. (pictures: 1 - what I look like in labor...completely focused and concentrating; 2 - Hadley's first picture...and our first picture together...both exhausted, but happy to see each other)

The labor was uncomfortable, but nothing like the 1st. The Bradley Method (for us) was the definite key. It was hard work and I was SO exhausted (mainly because of the circumstances...I am always exhausted after labor, but not to that extent...had just been awake and working too long). But, it was definitely do-able. The thought never even crossed my mind to ask for any pain medicine or anything.

I had really bad back labor. In the Bradley book ("Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way" by Susan McCutcheon...I highly recommend it, even if you don't plan a natural birth...just some GREAT info.) they talk about how your coach (Joel in my case) should be ready to constantly give a "backrub" for "backaches." Well, it's not actually a backrub...more like Joel has to spread his feet apart and push on my lower back as hard as he possibly can. Believe me, labor is hard work for him too. :-) We work really well together though. (picture: Hadley's weigh-in)

Also, the pushing part was very hard...the whole transition time actually. For one thing I was just so exhausted (by the time I started pushing, I had been up for 22 1/2 hours...working hard) and then of course the leftover problems of the stitching with the first birth. Yeah, pushing with Grady and Hadley was the worst to be quite honest...the worst pain I'd ever experienced. In fact, in my journal I described it as "excruciating" (and I never use that word...little too dramatic for my tastes...but, for this subject, was the best word to describe it). But, again...with each baby I've learned new things. Before I had Eissa, I learned some very important things about pushing that I think would've probably saved me some of the "excruicating" business had I known it at the time. (picture: Hadley, just a few hours old)

But, man oh man, what a difference. My birth experience was GREAT. I LOVED having a home birth. It was SO peaceful and quiet and relaxing. Not that it was painless or anything. It’s kind of hard to explain, but even with the pain it was a very relaxing way to give birth.

The whole thing was just incredible to experience, esp. after the experience of my labor and delivery with Grady. Joel was great...such a great help and support...we make a great team. At one point in the afternoon I began to get really discouraged. He prayed with me and encouraged me a ton and I felt so much better. Not only that, but after he prayed is when my contractions started up again for a while. He was also super during the active labor, being so attentive to my every need at all times. He would sit with me and make me take sips of water so I wouldn’t get dehydrated. He helped me so much by doing counterpressure...the back rub thing (a lot, and really hard). Not to mention the fact that he waited on me hand and foot for a couple of weeks afterwards. He’s the best. (picture: Joel and Hadley, a few hours old) And Carol was great...amazing midwife...I couldn’t believe the knowledge she had and the ways she knew how to “fix” things, an example being how she held my cervix forward for 30 minutes straight in order to get it to stay where it was supposed to be. It was just such a great experience and now we have such a great little girl. We are so thankful. God has truly blessed us with sweet joy in Hadley.

The recovery process was much better too...I'll explain more later.

Hadley's Birth Story - Part 1

On June 15th, 2004 we found out that I was pregnant with baby #2. Grady was 5 months old at the time we found out. My pregnancy was great and basically the same as with Grady. I continued to see the same midwife (the original one that was on vacation when Grady was born...she assured me that none of her other children were getting married around the time Hadley was due :-) ). We knew we still had hopes for an all-natural delivery, but also knew that we needed to do things differently if we were going to get it. We looked into the Bradley Method and a friend of mine from Bible study actually taught it, so we signed up. With Grady I wanted to do it naturally without the use of drugs, but I had no plan. Some people can just wing it and do fine, but I am not one of those people, as I wrote in his birth story. The way I dealt with the pain was by tensing up every muscle in my body and holding my breath...that didn’t help at all...in fact, it works against your body. The whole key to the Bradley Method is relaxation. We figured it was worth a shot and really felt like we were supposed to prepare in that way. (picture: Grady's favorite "stool" for a while)

As the Bradley classes went on, more and more we were considering a home birth. In the beginning I had thought about it, but Joel thought that it made more sense to progress slowly to that point. With Grady I had planned to deliver at the birthing center with the midwife. In the end I delivered at a hospital (thankfully still being able to use a midwife). We both thought that yes, that would be the logical thing to do...a progression from hospital to birthing center and then perhaps a home birth with the next baby. (picture: our Christmas card picture that year...2 months away from Hadley's birth) Well, the more we thought about my labor with Grady, the more we wanted to do a home birth. We both agreed that if I was going to have a natural birth then home would be the best place to do it. Although a hospital provides a great place for people to give birth naturally all the time, I just thought of it as so distracting and less peaceful. And although the birthing center is another great birthing option, it had proved to be not at all calming for me. With Grady I had gone to the birthing center only to be told to go home again because I was only 1 cm dilated. After 12 hours of strong contractions, 2-3 minutes apart for most of that time, I was vomiting and still only 2cm. Hello! Not fun. Still couldn’t stay at the birthing center. The drives there and back were horrendous for me while in labor. So, with relaxing being the key to what we wanted as our birth experience this time, we didn’t see how going back and forth to the birthing center fit in. That’s definitely not relaxing. I loved my midwife at the birthing center, but unfortunately the midwives there aren’t allowed to do home births. So...

At 35 weeks I switched. Kind of crazy to switch your whole birthing plan as far as your care provider and location that late in the game. But, we knew it was the right thing to do. We had an amazing peace about it.

Carol Denny, a midwife we had heard great things about (our Bradley teacher had used her, we actually used her office to have the Bradley classes in, and her oldest daughter was in our Bradley class), agreed to take me on. I had had good prenatal care up until that point and a very normal, easy pregnancy, so she said it would be no problem.

I got checked (internally) for the first time at 37 weeks. I was 50% effaced, but no dilation yet. She told me the baby was at a –2/-1 station...normal for 2nd pregnancies. Apparently it’s better if the baby is a little lower than that leading into labor with first babies, but with 2nd babies the baby can drop down at the last minute. Anyhow, given my progression, or lack thereof, with Grady (I was very slow dilating) she decided to try to start some dilation before labor. I took Evening Primrose Oil capsules (1500 mg/day), drank 2 cups of Red Raspberry Leaf Tea a day, and did 15 minutes of nipple stimulation 2 times a day. The herbs were fine...the other is definitely not my favorite. :-) (picture: WHOA!! what a great angle, right? :-) this was the night before I went into labor)

At my 38-week appt., I still wasn’t dilated a full 1cm. But, the neck of my cervix was open on the outside and really soft...still about 50% effacement. I started taking something called 5W...it has black cohosh and 4 other things in it. I also got sick that week (nausea, vomiting, diarrhea...not fun), but that’s beside the point. We upped the amount of the Evening Primrose Oil to 3000mg/day and I took 2 tablets of Red Raspberry Leaf Tea. I took 2 tablets of the 5W 3 times a day and also used 1 Evening Primrose Oil capsule as a vaginal suppository at bedtime to try to soften my cervix more. We weren't trying to start labor at all...just get me more ready for when it did happen.

At my 39-week appt. (February 16th), I was still 50% effaced and 1cm dilated. We were hoping for more dilation, but whatever...1cm was better than nothing. We were grateful for it.

On Friday the 18th I started losing my mucus plug. I wasn’t sure what it was because I had always heard it called a “bloody show.” I'd never experienced that with Grady either. There was nothing bloody about it for me though...just a white thick sticky discharge. But, I thought that it might be my mucus plug and went ahead and called Carol to let her know. That was the only thing that happened that day...bits and pieces of the mucus plug all day long...except that I had a hot date that night with my husband. :-) (the 2 pictures above, other than the Christmas card picture, were taken on the way out the door going on that date...I think we saw Oceans 12). Our anniversary is the 17th.

The birth...tomorrow.

Grady's Birth Story - Part 3

(There aren't really pictures to go along with this post (and I'm sure you'll be glad after you read what it's about...ha ha ha), so I'm going to just post a few shots before and after down below.)

Another issue after Grady's birth as far as recovery goes was the recovery from the episiotomy/tearing. Like I said, I had a pretty good 3rd degree tear/cut. When they were taking FOREVER to sew me up (and I had Grady right at shift change, so the other midwife for the next shift was there too...they were both sitting side by side at my bottom working on me), I had asked them how things were going. They very honestly said, "We're doing the best we can." Ahh, comforting. :-)

At around 7 weeks postpartum, I called my midwife (the original midwife who was on vacation when Grady was born) asking if I should still be hurting...the same as I did the 2nd week. She said no...I should be all healed up, to come on in. So, I went in and she didn't really want to go in to look (with a speculum), so she just felt a bit and said that she felt what seemed to be stitches. She said that I had to have lots of stitches and probably what it was was the stitches that Suzanne had used...apparently some different kind of stitching line that is used sometime that took longer to dissolve. She guessed that was what it was and told me that if it wasn't better soon, to of course come back.

Well, around 11 weeks it still wasn't better (I was being really limited in what I could do activity wise...there was a constant burning/pain there...not fun). Anyhoo, I went back, but this time I saw Suzanne thinking that she could give me some insight since she was the one who was there and did it. She checked me...as in with the speculum. Turns out, I had lots of granulation tissue. Basically what happens is that you heal, but you just keep on producing tissue past the point of just what's needed for the healing process. So, you have all this extra, really vascular tissue on top of what has healed (hence what Connie, the original midwife, had felt and thought were remaining stitches). No wonder I was hurting...all that vascular stuff that wasn't supposed to be there. So, I had to make an appt. and go back to see the doctor who worked there so that he could put silver nitrate on it (burn it off). Yes, loads of fun. By the way, Suzanne said she'd never seen it intra-vaginally before. I'm a weirdo.

I was hoping that would do the trick, but no...sometimes it takes more than one "treatment" and of course I had to go for a 2nd treatment. But, thankfully, after that, the granulation tissue was gone.

Unfortunately that didn't fix everything though. I always had some pain. I found out why when I started seeing my midwife that delivered Hadley. She said that it was just a poor job of stitching. Totally not blaming the midwives who stitched me up here...I truly am sure they did their best (some people just aren't gifted in the stitching area...I'm sure my 2nd midwife, a gifted stitcher, would've done it just fine). Joel said he didn't know how they were going to mend me though...from the looks of things he didn't think it was possible. Apparently some pretty bad tearing...and then of course the episiotomy (which I would never allow now). I had torn on the sides (at 4 o'clock and 6 o'clock) and then they had cut me down the middle. But, the problem was that in some places I was really tight and some places really loose. What would fix it?...either a miracle from God or tearing back open while having another baby and being re-stitched properly. The 2nd thing happened...and luckily for me not very long after Grady was born. :-)

Grady was (is) a joy and delight and these physical problems paled in comparison to having him around of course. Even though it was our first birth, we should've/could've been more prepared and probably avoided some of those things. But, just thought I'd share because that was a part of the whole story. It was a very different birth and recovery than we were hoping for, but for one thing, gave us great insight into what we wanted to do differently. We're thankful for that. And...of course we had a gorgeous, healthy little fun boy. Super duper thankful for that, no matter what the circumstances surrounding it.

Another pic of the weekend we found out we were having Grady. On the way back from Las Vegas, we took a tour of the Hoover Dam (and called some relatives to tell them we were preggie...we called Joel's Grandpa from the Hoover Dam...he thought that was cool).
If you haven't ever had pregnancy pictures done, I highly recommend. It was so much fun!! And, great mementos (we bought a CD of them unedited and this is the way I'm posting them...unedited/un-photo shopped). This was about 6 weeks before I had Grady.



We had this hanging in our apartment. We would just put Grady in this sometimes and let him swing/hang. We got this swing chair on our honeymoon in Honduras.
And here he is now. He LOVES this place, in his swing chair. Sometimes he's really quiet and I go to see what he's doing. He's just sitting in this chair, pondering the issues of life I guess. Love this boy.

Grady's Birth Story - Part 2

So, like I said, I had a beautiful baby boy. But, I also had a pretty bad 3rd degree tear/cut...and it was pretty zig-zaggedy. Not fun.

After he was born they put him immediately on my chest. I would've immediately nursed him (he was trying to find it), but I was lying flat on my back being stitched up...not a good nursing position esp. when you've never done it before. (picture: the first time I held him...my first picture with Grady)

One of the things that I REGRET SO MUCH is that I had had fever right before Grady was born. Well, of course I did. The room was super warm (while we were sleeping), I was completely immobile and under some really heavy heated blankets. It felt really nice, but I'm sure the immobility coupled with the heat was just enough to get me a little warmed up. (picture: during his first day...this is probably what he looked like when he came out, with that fist right on his forehead) By the time the labor was over I had no fever anymore, but Grady had a touch I believe...soon he was fever-free too. But, because of the previous fever, they wanted to get blood and run some tests. I should've just told them no. But, I complied. They took him to the nursery to get the blood and after a while a nurse came and told us that they had gotten some blood after a few pokes, but it wasn't sufficient for the lab. She asked if we still wanted to consent to them getting more blood. I must have been completely not thinking for a few hours after the birth...I didn't even think about it...I said yes, that we needed to go ahead and get it. What was I thinking?!?!? They had to poke him even more...several more times. Pretty horrible start at this life, esp. when it was completely unnecessary. Anyway, I've thought often about that and how I totally didn't protect my little baby boy then. I hate to even think about it. I've even explained that all to him before, asking his forgiveness. :-) I'm quite sure that he doesn't remember, but still...asking your child's forgiveness is a huge thing anyway and for him to know that we make mistakes (and did right from the start)...well, I think it just adds to our relationship. Anyway, that is a major regret for me. I don't harbor unforgiveness towards myself, but still...not my best moment as a mother...but, moving on.

He was born on a Sat. morning and at some point in the middle of the night Sat. night, we noticed that it just seemed like he was SO hungry and not getting anything. Of course my milk hadn't come in yet and he was a big boy with big needs I guess. But, still...the colostrum was supposed to be enough...and he was supposed to be sleeping, not awake all the time wanting food (I've read stories of babies who were just fine without really getting anything to eat for a couple of days until the mom's milk came in...then about that time is when they started to really wake up). Anyway, inexperienced us decided to just supplement...just until my milk came in. Really though...we didn't know what else to do (now we know better...you'll read about it in Eissa's story...took us that long to be told exactly what to do). He seriously stayed latched on to me at one point for one hour on each side (that's 2 hours total) and was still screaming hungrily. (picture: our kids have all come out smiling...and no, it's not because of gas)

We stayed in the hospital until Monday morning and then headed home. Monday night my milk came in. It was still no good though...I just didn't make enough, period. I took every herbal medicine known to man (that was supposed to stimulate lactation), drank every herbal tea, was practically waterlogged all the time from drinking so much water, pumped alot...all in hopes of making enough milk. I finally went to see a lactation consultant after about 6 weeks. There I got more herbs and also rented a hospital-grade pump. The routine went like this...I would nurse Grady, supplement him with formula, then pump on each side for 15 minutes. Basically by the time I had gone through this whole routine, it was time to nurse Grady again. It was super draining and tiring and disappointing. I did this for about 6 weeks or so (therefore Grady was 12 weeks...can you tell I wasn't giving up easy? :-) ). Then, I had a trip coming up. Me and Grady went to Saline for Easter (Joel flew himself and met us there) and I decided that if it hadn't happened before we left, I was not about to rent a hospital-grade pump for Saline and keep up that routine. It unfortunately didn't happen before then, so I continued to nurse him after that point when I felt full, but after I stopped pumping, basically my milk just gradually decreased until I never felt full and was exclusively bottle/formula-feeding Grady...that was around April I guess. That was a disappointment. I was never into it because of the "bonding" factor...I feel like you can bond just fine without having a baby latched on. But, it's just so convenient and natural. That's what God meant...what He designed our bodies to do. Why wasn't it working? But, like I said, I learned more later...and for this time, I just got over it. (pictures: first family pic. and all bundled up, about to leave the hospital)

Ahh, Grady...my non-sleeping baby. This was another thing that was different than what we expected. I had no idea what those people were talking about when they said they had to wake their baby up to nurse. Our baby was always awake. Was it because we were inexperienced and were constantly overstimulating him? Was it effects of the drugs he had gotten at the hospital (through my epidural and other drugs)? Was it a lack of a proper routine, even though we were trying to get him on a routine (the Babywise thing)? All of these things are technically a possibility. Who knows. We'll probably never know, but to say that we learned alot is an understatement. We managed though.

He was pretty fussy for a while. Some would've called it colic. In fact, when Joel's mom came to visit when Grady was about 6 weeks old, we were at the airport waiting for her flight home when she said that she'd be praying that Grady wouldn't be so colicky.

The good thing is that around May (4 months), he started sleeping through the night. The bad thing is that he didn't nap during the day really...he would sleep around 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the afternoon...not good naps by baby standards (he did this until right after his first birthday, then miraculously started sleeping about an hour and a half each time and we never had sleep issues with him again; I think God was just giving us a break before the little sister came along). But, he ceased that fussiness and was a good baby...just wasn't into sleeping much (during the day). He would go down sometimes around 5:30 or 6pm though and sleep until 6 or 7am the next morning. Usually he got up around 6. So, even though the naps during the day weren't good, he thankfully was an excellent sleeper at night. That was great.

And how can you beat those dimples? :-)